Not Forever Now

Listening to Evangeline and drinking hazelnut coffee. Things have been so-so lately. Doing much better with work stress. But unfortunately still all messed up hormonally. When will it get better? If things don't regulate soon, my docs suggested turning off my ovaries for 3-6 months. That means hot flashes and other nice menopausal side effects again. Question: Which bad scenario is better? I had the gnarliest panic attack ever last week. I kept seeing (SWMB not SWME) a person wearing a giant stuffed buffalo head - some weird Pagan symbolism? Wdk what was going on, but it was completely terrifying. Another thing is I possibly have sleep apnea. Tomorrow night I'm doing a polysomnography test. I'm pretty excited for it because had I chosen an academic career, it would have been in sleep & dream research. Even though I like the rain and the fog hanging inbetween the trees, I really wish it wasn't already dark when I leave work.